Strategies for the Shy Singer: Part 2
Last month we interviewed 2x Grammy winner, Kalani Pe’a on the topic of overcoming shyness and a lack of confidence. Singers struggle with this more often than you think. If you haven’t read it yet, be sure to do so here. Read on for some more strategies you can apply while you practice at home, and when you hit the stage.
AT HOME
The adage of singing in the shower - Whether it’s in the shower, the car, or on a remote hiking trail, the point is to find some place truly private so that you can really wail. Pull deep from within and sing with all your heart along to your very favorite songs (still remember to use good technique!). Then sing along to the karaoke version with just as much gusto. Don’t worry about if your voice cracks or wobbles, just sing with passion and emotion - this isn’t about perfection, it’s about finding your voice!
Start small - Sing in front of your pets, then one person who really loves you. Then maybe a few people. Build your audience, bit by bit.
Film yourself - Just the act of hitting that record button and imagining that you’re going to post it for all the world to see can kick those butterflies into gear, while still being a safe environment - a great way to practice! Then you get to evaluate yourself, and see for yourself if you look scared or uncomfortable, or maybe not “selling it” as much as you think you are.
Channel an alter ego - Maybe Sasha Fierce (see below), or maybe a Disney princess or Sponge Bob, anything goes! Experiment by saying, “When I put on this hat (for example), I am now this character. This character is bold, funny, strange, fabulous, etc, but not shy at all! I’m just going to sing as this character for a while, and see if it helps me relax and get comfortable.” Give this character a different name, and practice invoking and getting into your new, fearless alter ego.
Try playing an instrument while singing - Sometimes the distraction of focusing on having to do something else other than sing is all it takes to loosen up, and sing more freely. Here’s a perfect example - watch this episode of Carpool Karaoke with Ed Sheeran. You can see how he seems very self-conscious at first, but once he grabs his guitar, he starts relaxing and enjoying himself. He admits how anytime he feels awkward performing, he just reaches for his guitar and the anxiety goes away.
ON STAGE
Channel Sasha Fierce - Find your alter ego, and become that big, bold, rock star persona when you step on stage - as Beyonce famously does. And she has undoubtedly grown into Ms. Fierce, she is one and the same now. Perfect example: this video of Beyonce performing “I Care”. Maybe that means you need to wear red lipstick, high heels, or a hat to help get you into that power mode. Do it! When you practice, wear that item of confidence, so that you begin to associate that item with feeling confident. Watch Beyonce talk about “Sasha Fierce” in the short video clip below.
Fake It Till You Make It - Don’t say things like “omg, I’m so nervous,” to the audience. While people will sympathize, they’re also already now expecting you to do poorly. And if you rock, they’re going to think you manipulated them for extra applause, or that you’re needy for compliments. Act like you’ve done it 100 times already, from the moment you get on stage to the moment you walk away.
Bring cheerleaders - Bring the people who will cheer and support you no matter what. Allow them to help you stay out of your head and focused on the fun and joy of singing!
And finally, shift your mindset - Try to remember why you’re doing this - because you love to sing! Don’t make the goal of the performance to do a perfect job or blow anyone’s minds, make the goal be simply to have fun, or even more simply - to not run off stage. That’s truly a valid goal! You can feel proud and victorious, just for staying and performing.